A burger habit is an unhealthy habit. A burger habit in Los Angeles, at Father’s Office, is an expensive, unhealthy habit.
But it tastes so good. Despite the pangs in the heart muscles, as those poor little arteries try to pump blood after ingesting so much meat—so much fat—producing ‘squish, squish’ oily kind of feeling an internal organ should never get, despite the $20+ cost of a burger, fries, and beer, the Office Burger at Father’s Office (FO) tastes so good. In a true display of addiction, I can never say no. Oftentimes, I’m even the one suggesting Office Time.
Consider, the perfect burger. (And this is a burger to be found in the kingdom of In-n-Out. The ‘perfect burger’ crown is not a headpiece to be taken lightly.)
A patty of perfectly rare—or medium-rare if you’re dainty—dry-aged beef topped with blue cheese, gruyere, caramelized onion, bacon balsamic compote, and a layer of arugala to add a note of spice. Complement that with a wall of beer, a pile of fries, and parsley garlic aioli and you’ve got yourself the perfect burger, in the perfect place. Take a seat outside under the sunken-in heat lamps and enjoy.
Despite its perfection, there is quite possibly, the chance that four trips to Father’s Office is too much of a good thing. The kind of thing that causes a bit of heavy-breathing on a morning run. Oops. And so, the MPBOAT (most-perfect-burger-of-all-time) must be balanced with…kale. Like a magic food eraser, kale banishes all those bad burger side-effects, cleaning up a burger-laden-body for the next trip to FO. (Logic.)
If there is magic in this world, outside of the MPBOAT, then kale chips are certainly some kind of spell. Kale chips are their own kind of wonderful—toasted, nutty, bites of iron-laden, low-cal goodness. They aren’t better than potato chips, but they are just as good. I swear. Love me some burger and fat, but kale chips are delicious. What’s even more amazing is that, when faced with a bowl (kale chips do not come in bags) it’s possible to polish them all off. Which means that you’ve just consumed a head of kale.
My family, myself included, doesn’t often venture into the land of the uber-healthy. It’s a scary place filled with tempeh and vegans. But thanks to our family friend Besty, we had a guide, and she opened the door to kale chips. Not only are they delicious, guilt-free, and crunchy, but boy are they easy to make. The perfect thing to eat when you’re not ingesting a cow and a pig.
Recipe on the following page.