If there was ever an intellectual challenge, this is it. The quest: search far and wide, in towns, cities and villages (villages?) and find a job that is superior to owning a pie truck. That’s right, a pie truck. Take an ordinary ice cream truck, get rid of that tweeting, chirpy theme song box, the deep-freeze barrels and replace it with warming trays and pie. Slice after slice of homemade pies. Fruits pies, chess pies, chocolate pies and savory pies. Fill up a truck with pie, and drive it around. I dare you to propose an occupation that outdoes the happiness quota of manning a pie truck.
You may not make millions, but there will be millions of pies.
Work? Hardly. You’d be sitting in a mobile heaven, a small chamber of pie-love on wheels. And just think of all the joy that a pie truck spreads to the less-fortunately employed, simply by dispensing pies across the city. With all the good-will being spread, you’d be hard pressed not to be escalated to sainthood. By driving a pie truck, spread good cheer and fruit-filling, the masses would assemble to petition for the addition of a halo to your image as a PieMan. That’s the power of pie.
I can’t take credit for the sheer genius of a pie truck, Dangerously Delicious Pies of Baltimore, Maryland has already done it with their Dangerously Delicious Pie (Truck) roaming the streets of Washington. The black truck emblazoned with pie and cross-bones travels the DC streets, even during the slushy snow days that seem to scare off the more delicate cupcake and pastry trucks. And even on such snow days, the pies are hot and yes, dangerously delicious.
After a quick two-hour session of productivity at work and twitter research which revealed that the Dangerously Delicious truck was less than four blocks away, I recruited a fellow pie fan for a lunch break. Because of course, pie constitutes only the most nutritious and delicious of lunches. Having made the unfortunate decision to wear my glasses, after about two minutes outside in the odd Washington combination of snow and wet sleet-rain, I was blind. Actually requiring eyesight-help, fogged-up glasses do nothing in aiding the absolutely necessary step in food truck locating—the actual spotting. All the twitter information in the world does nothing when it comes down to finding the physical truck. Following a quick detour in the wrong direction though, the pie truck was spotted…and it was pulling away!
Thankfully, my pie compatriot was a native New Yorker, and therefore was born with an affinity for hailing moving vehicles. The Dangerously Delicious Pies (Truck) pulled over in a bus stop and a lined formed, complete with DC policemen who had no interest in illegally parked vehicles, only in the Apple Pie. The PieMan in the truck was more than happy to recommend pies, insisting of course that they were all good, but that the Baltimore Bomb was currently the best-seller.
The pies. Oh the pies. The Baltimore Bomb, a sweet vanilla chess pie (southern tradition, egg-based baked custard) loaded up with Berger Cookies that melt down and create a sweet, chocolaty miss-mash, is a winner if you’re in the mood for something close to the maximum tolerable amount of sweetness. In true pie form, the Blueberry Pie is perfectly warm, messy, and loaded with a tart and remarkably fresh fruit filling. The crust is appropriately flaky and not at all soggy. Each slice is served in an individual container and while $6.50 a slice may seem pricey, you’re getting a good sixth of a pie, and a delicious homemade pie at that. It’s also on the go, for the spur-of-the-moment pie need.
Only after demolishing the pie did we notice the looks of envy from the other patrons in the coffee shop we had settled in. They should be envious. Those who lack pie really should remedy the situation. And what better way than to walk outside and visit a pie truck?
Dangerously Delicious Pies (Truck) accepts credit cards, for those struck by the need-for-pie when they are unfortunately lacking cash.